When faced with profound loss, it's not about getting rid of the grief but growing around it with time. It's okay to grieve, feel happy, and then grieve again. The cycle can take hours, minutes, days, months, years. Sometimes, grief never ends, but we grow. We honour the memory of the dead and allow the grief a place in our systems, together with joy and all the normal experiences of life. 

This picture from theralphsiteshop.com illustrates the process beautifully. 

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